Hey, remember when I was going to turn this into a cooking blog? Same HB, same day-to-day disasters, just with, you know, cooking thrown into the mix?
And I even archived my old posts and blew up my FB writer page so You Knew I Was Serious?
Do you have any idea how much actual WORK goes into a cooking blog?
Because I did not.
Oh, you think you’re just gonna snap a few quick photos while you’re making dinner and call it a day, right? That’s ADORABLE. Let’s take a mini-tour through my Google Photos to show you how that works out:
You think you’re gonna throw together a quick step-by-step IG story on how to make a soufflé because it’s SO EASY and everyone should learn how to do it. Then you and your husband sit down to actually eat said soufflé at 10:30. PM. Only, by this time, said soufflé has retreated into its baking dish like a frightened turtle because you spent too much time taking photos for the Internet. Side note: It really is super-easy to make a soufflé, when you’re JUST MAKING THE DAMN SOUFFLÉ without styling shots (poorly) and taking photos of Every. Single. Step. Of. The. Process.
And then you stop watching your two-year-old for thirty seconds while you’re kneading a panade into ground lamb for grilled kofta:
This is madness.
It’s time to admit – well, not admit defeat, exactly – but maybe to admit reality. Julia Child didn’t have kids bickering and pulling the house apart as she flambéed the veal. You almost never see toddlers with their fists jammed down their diapers yelling POOPY POOPY POOPY on Martha Stewart’s set. Yes, I love to cook, but my cuckoo-bananas home life prevents me from writing about it. I mean, maybe I’ll do an occasional cooking post when I have some extra …. yeah, no. You all know damn well what I’m doing with my exceedingly rare and precious spare time:
Back to homegrown disaster it is. Back to the old HB.
Back to the old stock theme. This (also stock) theme is cute and all, but it’s not me.
Back to writing on the interwebs about daily life around here and making Matt wince.
Back to reassuring all of you that the crazy nonsense going on in your homes is happening here, too.
I’m even bringing back the old posts.
But death to the FB writer page, you guys. I don’t have time for all that nonsense.